Hear It on Sunday, Use It on Monday: In Awe of God's Yes

I’ve never been a go-with-the-flow, contented, optimistic person. For as long as I can remember, I’ve been a bit disgruntled, prone to negativity and discontent, restless and anxious.

Back in the 18^th century I probably would have been diagnosed with melancholia – a little too much black bile.

In the 19^th century it would have been the vapors, or perhaps hysteria. I might have been prescribed the rest cure (bring it on, I say).

In the 21^st century, of course, my malady is defined as depression and anxiety. I take medication for this. I have every day for the last six years – except for the two weeks a couple of years ago when I quit cold turkey and went all sorts of crazy. We won’t be trying that again.

My point is, I’ve struggled with being happy for pretty much my entire life. I’m not naturally happy. I’m not naturally content. I worry a lot. I’ve bitten my fingernails since the third grade; I suffered from an ulcer when I was in high school. I get tension headaches and eye twitching and irritable bowel and TMJ (shall I go on?) – all products of anxiety.

But (if you're still reading) it’s not all bad news.

I’ve realized recently that what’s impacted my ongoing pursuit of joy and contentment the most in recent years (in addition to the anti-depressant, of course) is the daily practice of thanksgiving.

The truth is – and this is going to sound really basic and more than a little obvious – a person can’t be ungrateful and thankful at the same time. It’s simply not possible to hold both a disgruntled, ungrateful thought in your mind simultaneously with a thankful thought. And so, as it goes, the more thankful I am, the more frequently I consciously offer gratitude and thanksgiving to God, the less inclined I am to be negative.

The act of being thankful has simply created less time, less opportunity, less room for negativity. Gratefulness has crowded out, overpowered, ingratitude.

I know I make gratitude sound scientific and pragmatic, but for me, it is a pragmatic process, because pragmatic works for me. I need an intentional practice, a formula, so to speak, because I am stubborn, and because my brain has been accustomed to working one way – on negative, anxious auto-pilot – for decades. The practice of daily – hourly, minute-by-minute – thanksgiving has retrained my brain.

The intentional practice of giving thanks has broken the cycle of discontent.

I had a revelation during yesterday’s reading of Psalm 128 in church:

"All you who fear God, how blessed you are! How happily you walk on his smooth straight road! You worked hard and deserve all you’ve got coming. Enjoy the blessing! Revel in the goodness! …Stand in awe of God’s Yes. Oh, how he blesses the one who fears God. Enjoy the good life in Jerusalem every day of your life.” (1-2, 4-5, The Message).

In the past, if I'd heard those words, I would have assumed they were meant for someone else. “Yada, yada, yada, whatever,” I would have thought. “Those blessings, that joy, it’s not for me. I’m just not made that way.”

You know what? Yesterday when I listened to the words from Psalm 128 I thought, “Yes.” Yes! Yes! Yes! I am blessed. I walk happily. I revel in this goodness.

And why? Why? Because I am thankful. It really is that simple. I give thanks, again and again and again, for God’s Yes. He rains these yeses on me, day in and day out, in every aspect of my life. And I say yes in return.  

I stand in awe of God’s Yes.

Has the practice of thanksgiving changed your life or outlook in any way?

{A timely addendum: This morning, just after my Aunt Kathy read this post, she read this article and then emailed it to me, noting how providential it was that she read one right after the other. Turns out, there IS a science to this gift-counting - glass-half-empties like me can retrain our brains!}

{I know you don't see this list pop up on the blog very often, but just know that I am counting, always counting. This, this list right here, is the ongoing retraining of my brain to live joy and say yes}:

1080 Reading on the patio in quiet with Noah

1081 A Tupperware full of “dog water” on the side of the path on a hot day

1082 Rowan’s pet bunny “to do” list

1083 Flash of orange oriole in the backyard

1084 Noah telling me all about “Zucchini the Pirhana” at the pet store

1085 Weeding the garden

1086 Tie-dyed t-shirts hanging from backyard trees

1087 Tomato hot off the vine

1088 Grandparents proudly carrying grandbabies to communion

1089 Singing hymns loud around the house when no one else is home

1090 Curt smiling big and ruffling the blond boy’s hair in church

1091 The abiding prayer {thank you Deidra and H}

1092 Stack of library books

1093 Buying a tiny newborn outfit for my brand-new baby cousin

1094 A brave husband who stands down the thugs

1095 Sweaty, laughing bike ride with Deidra

And also with these communities this week:

 {Laura on Monday}

{Jennifer and the Soli Sisters on Tuesday}  {Jennifer Dukes Lee and Duane Scott on Wednesday} 

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